Article Categories Relationships Post-Divorce

After A Divorce: Your Life Is Your Own


By: Tina L. Jones


Are you one of the millions of women who wonder what to do after a divorce turns life upside down? Do you feel lost in a sea of single women, and wonder where to turn? Do you wish you knew how to make your future your own, and enjoy life once again? As much as divorce is an end to a chapter of your life, it is also a beginning to a new chapter. Once you have experienced divorce, you're never quite the same - but the good news is, after a divorce, your life is your own. Here are a few ways to make yourself feel a bit more complete.

Your Own Goals: Who Do You Want To Be?

When you were married, you and your husband very likely had some common goals and plans, and you probably had some goals of your own that didn't quite mesh with what he thought ought to be happening. Now that you are living life on your own, you are free to set your own goals and do what it takes to accomplish them. So take some time to plan for your future. Even if your personal goals might seem a bit outrageous, the fact is, you can certainly go for them! The first step in moving forward after a divorce is knowing where you're headed.

Your Friends and Family: Reconnect

Most women shed old friends and even seem to lose touch with some treasured family members once they settle into married life. Suddenly, it seems as if those old dear ones just don't mean as much as your new husband - that is, until you're unhappy in your marriage! Now that you've gotten rid of the negativity in your life, it is time to reconnect with your old friends and family members you wish you were a bit closer to. Now is the time to begin enjoying life once more. So, write some letters or emails, and make a few phone calls. These people are your new support system - and you can be they will be happy to help you now that you need them once again.

New Relationships After A Divorce

It is not surprising that many women who are newly divorced find themselves seeking male companionship. Whether you want to date new people, or if you feel unrequited love for an old flame from your past, now is the time to get started with a new relationship.

Take it slowly - even though you probably feel a sense of freedom and empowerment right now, you are probably also very fragile in some ways. Now might be a good time to go out with your girlfriends, and enjoy some drinking and dancing. Re-learn how to flirt, but don't get involved with anyone until you're ready. A new relationship after a divorce should be something that is all about perfection. Don't get in too deep with someone you are only superficially interested in.

Most people who are on the rebound do have a few fairly innocent or almost meaningless relationships with others - we enjoy meeting new people, feeling sexy and attractive, and we like the fact that others are interested in us. So, don't be afraid to date!

Once you have your own goals and dreams firmly planted in your mind, and you have really gotten your head around the fact that you are free to enjoy life on your own terms, it might be safe to become involved in a serious relationship - life after a divorce is interesting, and it can be a lot of fun - so look for what you want, and be ready for success the next time round.

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